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Hey everyone! June was a very busy month for us and it seems like every day more things are crossed off our list and we are getting closer! If you want to see our actual home listings and my updated checks click here
This is what blogging looks like now,
we are all hugging on the front porch
Home Study
Our home study is coming to an end!! We worked hard to get all our documents to start meetings and I was disappointed when it took 2 weeks for the organization to assign us a social worker. Wes has his big board exam (Step 2) on July 15 and after that he starts his internal medicine rotation. I called for a few days and they kept saying “yes we have your papers and they are on the director’s desk”. We found a social worker and she lives in Naperville (about 20 minutes away) and is from Michigan!!! AND she is a BIRTHMOM!! AND THEY HAVE BENGAL TOO!! He was like “yeah let’s do these meetings”!!! Originally we were told that our meetings would have to be held at their office for an hour, but since they live close to us we are holding all meetings at our home which is GREAT!! So here is the description and details of the meetings:
Meeting 1 (last Tuesday)
The meeting lasted 3.5 hours! Our brains were fried when it was over. It was mostly a meeting to get to know each other and begin to explain the process in depth, and we had long, long conversations about adoption (adopting a child of any other race than us), dealing with drugs and alcohol, and open parenting. He also answered my question What exactly is homeschooling? It’s a document, usually 14 pages long, that shows who we are, past and present, and confirms that we’ve been vetted and have parental consent. The social worker will actually write a home study and say what kind of child we can be (so hopefully she will write YES we can care for any kind of child and YES we can care for a child with drug addiction Etc).
We talked about things like what we can expect if we have a child with a different color than ours and how our family will live. As the fact that we will be watched and noticed everywhere we go, people make comments (good or bad) on a regular basis. People will say things like “oh you’re so good for having a baby who is xyz color” and we’ll respond with words like “no, WE ARE blessed!” etc. etc. And then of course big things like how we raise a black-skinned child in a white family/community. Maybe one day we will live in a different place but where we are now is very beautiful, so how can we help our child to feel like he belongs and help him to know who he is? We talked a lot about the history of mental illness and drug/alcohol addiction and the long-term effects we can expect, and we have to decide which activities we think would be right for our family. This is very difficult because it is wrong to refuse a child for any reason, but some of these can cause serious problems so we have to make a wise decision either way.
We also talked a lot about open parenting and how GREAT it is! I feel like I should write a whole post about this since so many people ask me about it and are surprised that we are okay with it. But in short, it’s great and we hope we can have a relationship with the birth parents and maybe a family. If a child can grow up knowing who their birth family is and where they come from then there should be no more dreaming and imagining what their family will be like. And I’m sure you can imagine how much better and healthier it would be for a birth mother to know that she could watch her baby grow from afar.
The 2nd meeting planned for July 11 – this meeting will be about our history and our lives.
The 3rd meeting is scheduled for July 15th – this will be mainly to inspect our buildings and sign more papers.
So we are done!! And they just need to write our homework.
We registered with Christian Adoption Consultants!
We have a lot of documents to go through but the most important thing was the list of organizations to choose from. We narrowed it down to 4 organizations to sign with right away. The reason for doing it this way verses working with one agency is that we are more transparent so we can compare quickly, and we don’t put money up front. Most agencies make you pay a sign-on fee that is anywhere from $5,000-$15,000 and is non-refundable. These agencies remove their tag from CAC families’ fees. We also KNOW that these are ethical organizations that do not exploit pregnant women (which is apparently not uncommon). Our startups are located in Florida and Texas. We can’t wait to start waiting. Laugh.
Our History Book IS OUT!
I spent maybe 20 hours designing and writing it. It was hard, but a lot of fun. The biggest problem I ran into was I made an 11×8.5 book and I wanted it to be soft cover (less than $), but when I went to order the book I found out that they only make hard cover books. Hardcover books are almost double and we need 20 books to make up the difference. I wasted a lot of time trying to figure out what to do and I ended up thinking it wasn’t worth my time to remodel it to save $150. The book will be delivered in the next two weeks and I can’t wait to show it to you all.
Puzzle Fundraiser update!
We’re almost done with our puzzle fundraiser! Again, I can’t thank you all enough for helping us. This adoption would not be possible without all of your support! If you missed our original post about our photo shoot you can find it here
I will have some updates soon. Thank you so much for following along! Please pray for us to continue to finish this home study quickly, and please pray for someone I met this week who has been on my heart. Have a great 4th of July weekend!!!
Love,
Charlotte