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We are done with our homework!! THERE!!!
I should have written this two weeks ago, since it’s been two weeks, but I’ve been so busy!! Doing homework is a great, wonderful relief. We are approved and licensed to be parents now! The homework went well, but we didn’t enjoy it. Our case worker was very difficult and gave us a lot of trouble for adopting a different type of child. It was like they wanted to scare us. We weren’t sure what was going on because we kept saying YES we are open to any type and then they said “but you can’t get it” and we were just confused and wondering…..you want us to say no? Finally we are accepted after HOURS on hours of discussion and extra training and we say YES!!! I don’t know why they were bothering us like this. I’ve talked to other people who said it wasn’t like that with them so I’m not sure if it was him or us, but either way it’s over now and only God knows who our child will be, and that’s how it should be!
Here are some ideas for homeschooling:
It was difficult. It was confusing and a little frustrating. I’m an open book and I probably share a lot about my life. But having to explain so much to someone who HAS the POWER to tell you that you are not fit to be a parent is HARD. And we know we deserve it. But just admitting that we can’t get pregnant and have our own children is hard enough, we have to put ourselves at the center and say “look at us, up and down, look at us, look up and down, shake and dig our secrets, judge as hard as you want” so that YOU can decide if we are fit to be parents. I don’t know what to think about that. I think I started to feel like it wasn’t fair that everyone had the right to get pregnant whether they were eligible or not. There are GREAT parents out there and they don’t need to search too hard. I am humbled to think. Actually, humble is a very good word.
So what’s next?
The employee has 30 days to complete our home study. I think I said this before that home study is a document. I didn’t know that. They must write a detailed report on us and this document is what will be sent to the agencies and is our “license” if you will. Once the home study document is finished we will send it to organizations along with our history books (which is done!!) and we will start showing our books to expectant mothers. We can be chosen at any time and the baby can be born already or there may be a due date soon. We have no idea. I feel like I’m pregnant but I don’t know when my due date is. It’s a really crazy feeling, and to say I’m scared is an understatement. Everyone says you don’t need much for a newborn, and yes, I know. But I am one of those people who WANTS to be organized and prepared. And right now I’m not ready, so I’m going into panic mode wanting to read children’s books on sleep habits and I’m doing research and registering things for children as my JOB. I always hear women talking about the part of the nest before the baby comes where they clean and prepare like crazy. I remember watching my brother in law nest in front of every child and it was like whoa! I think I’m doing the same thing. And it’s good! I feel like things are really happening, this is really going to happen. I’m going to be a mother….SOON!
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| Trying out the new baby carrier! It’s a dream! |
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| Starting to collect things slowly |
I was at my friends house last night and she was giving me baby stuff and her two year old was asking me and she said “Charlotte is having a baby soon” and hearing someone say it out loud took me away. It felt amazing. I will write about our history book soon. It’s done and delivered and I want to share it, but I haven’t had time to write a post yet.
PRAYER:
Please pray with us for our precious child and the mother carrying our child. The realization that our baby is already pregnant and growing is hitting me hard and I can’t stop thinking about it. Our son is out there. Please pray with us that we will find her soon and that the woman will have peace and love and that she will have the strength to take care of herself and the child. We love you so much already sweet baby.
Fundraiser question
We have pieces of the puzzle left to raise funds for fundraising. If you feel called to help us financially we’d love to put your name on our photos! The details are here